Episode 052- Break The Rules
Hello, welcome to episode 52 of the One Girl Band podcast. I’m Lola Hoad, and I’m a creative coach, writer and speaker based in Brighton, UK. I’m the founder of One Girl Band, a collective for female entrepreneurs + creatives to have a space to support, empower and connect with one another. This podcast is meant as a little pep talk for female creative entrepreneurs who are craving that bit of motivation needed to get through this journey of self employment, as well as chats with real life one girl band’s that get to the heart of what we do, along with all the trials and tribulations that come with it. So grab a cuppa and get ready to be one step closer to living the life that you deserve and desire.
Today’s episode is a mini one about professionalism and why I want you to start breaking the rules.
In the early days of running a business, I used to worry that I wasn’t ‘professional’ enough; that my swearing and awkwardness and toothpaste-stained jumpers in meetings (I wish I could say that was years ago but I’d be lying- it was today) meant I wasn’t a ‘proper’ business owner. I’d censor myself. I’d put on a front and act like someone I didn’t really like because I thought that was what it meant to be serious and successful and sorted. But now, I know that’s not the case. You see, we’re the first generation to be doing this; to be creating our own careers and living this slashie/multi-hyphenate/multi-potentialite life. We don’t stick to one thing like our parents or grandparents might’ve done. There are no rules, no guidelines or regulations. And if there are, break them. Do things the way you want to do them and you’ll soon see that there is no ‘one’ way. Like I’ve said in the past, there is no special hashtag, silver bullet or sales strategy to success. Just because there are people out there telling you they make 6 figures and you can too if you follow these rules, doesn’t mean you have to follow those rules. What might work for them might not work for you and that is ok. My one piece of advice to people who ask questions when they first start their businesses is yes, consume content, learn as much as you can until you have various insights into how to do things and then chuck it all away. Don’t spend time doing the things that don’t work for you or give you joy. Don’t start a youtube channel if you don’t want to, no matter how many people are saying video is the future. Don’t start a podcast if you don’t want to- I saw a tweet the other day that said there are more podcasts on the planet than humans and it gave me great joy. Don’t slave away at trade shows or fairs if that’s not a part of your version of success. Don’t act all ~professional~ if that’s not you. If you’re more trainers and jeans than power suits and heels, stick to that. If you’d rather spend time on creating content than going to network events where you need to wear a name badge and impress someone within 3 seconds of meeting them before they turn away and find someone else with a better elevator pitch, create, create, create. There is no such thing as a ‘proper’ business owner. Just speak your truth, be kind to everyone you meet and show up every day in whatever way you can — don’t worry about not being ‘professional’ enough. You’re a fucking professional — however you want to define it.
You're not going to be everyone's cup of tea and not everyone is going to be yours- and that is fine. This was probably one of the biggest lessons I learned when I first started in business; as someone who used to need constant acceptance and validation from EVERYONE (even the postman), I would really struggle if I didn't get that. If I got one shitty email from someone who read something I wrote saying my work was 'awful', I'd think about quitting. If a family member did the whole 'you should get a real job' spiel, I'd feel devastated that they didn't see my skill or abilities and would go out of my way to show them that it was working. I soon realised that you can try to be everyone's favourite but the things you write, make, create and put out there are not going to relate to everyone. Some will love it and some just won't understand. If they're shitty about it, it's because they fear the fact they don't get it. None of it has anything to do with you. All we can do is focus on creating for the people who get it and love it and enjoy it, and just be kind. Be kind to the ones who support you, to the ones who doubt you, and the ones who don't know you (but will one day because you're a star). And be kind to yourself, that's an important one.
There is just zero point in doing things the same way everyone else is doing them, even if it looks like it’s working for them. You’re not creating your own path and doing your own thing to follow the same path and do the same thing that everyone else is doing. You’re doing your own thing so you can create the life YOU want, not the life they want. If you’re stuck in a cycle of buying e-courses that go untouched, reading every and any business book out there and not going forward with anything unless you talk it through with a hundred different people first: put down your tools and take a step back. Think about what you truly want, what your version of success is. Not your parent’s versions, or your friend’s versions or your fellow business owner’s versions. Yours and yours alone. And then listen to your gut. The answer is always within you (no matter how wanky that sounds), and you will always work it out. Promise.
Ok, that was a bit more ranty than I was expecting but I hope that helped those you feel they should be a certain way to be an entrepreneur. Just do you, whatever that means.
And that’s it for episode 52. If you want to know more about One Girl Band, and the work we do for female entrepreneurs and creatives plus info on our events and coworking space, then do have a look at onegirlband.co.uk. If you’re interested in working together through coaching, you can head to lolahoad.co.uk to find out more about my packages and what I offer. I do apologise for the lack of consistency with the podcast at the moment; as you’re aware there is still a lot going on in my personal life and I’m gutted that I’m not able to get this content out as much I want to but I promise we’ll be back to normal soon. Promise, promise. As always, I’m cheering you on and I’ll see you next week. Have a good one.